Tuesday, January 18, 2011

I have the map. I just need to follow the directions.

I was thinking today about why I’m having such a hard time losing the weight, and changing my poor habits. Through SparkPeople and the internet in general, I have the map. I have the workout plans, the strength training exercises, the cardio workouts, I have the food plans, the menus, the shopping lists, the nutritional values, the free food trackers. I literally have the directions written down for me to follow. Yet, when it comes down to it, I always take the wrong path on this map.

And I still don’t understand why. It’s like “weight loss” has been handed to me, on a platter with a note that says follow this and you’ll be thin. So why don’t I? Yes, the hard part is actually following the directions, but it’s certainly not impossible. I must have some semblance of self-control, if I was able to already lose the 30 pounds. [sigh] I’m still working hard at following the directions. I hate this feeling, of knowing what I need to do and not actually doing it. I think this may be my laziness coming through. I don’t know, but I’m figuring it out.

Friday, January 7, 2011

YAY! Update!

Sorry so late, but things have been a little hectic around here. At my weigh-in on Tuesday, I was down 1.6 pounds, to 282.2, which is the lowest I’ve been since I started on weight watchers again. This week, I’ve tracked really well, every bite I’ve eaten, drank a lot more water and I’ve worked out for the last two days with Jeff. I feel kind of rejuvenated, I guess is the word, because when I not only have his support, but also his willingness to eat well and workout with me, I do amazingly well!

When I got home last night, it was to an already cooked meal, ready to be eaten. And because I wasn’t in the kitchen cooking it (all by myself) I wasn’t eating and snacking on crap before dinner because I was hungry. By doing that, he helped me to keep within my points yesterday, and after we worked out, I even got a mini bagel with some natural peanut butter and an apple as a snack. I never get snacks because I always eat too much, but they fit right within my points, and I’m really excited about that.

This weekend is going to be a bit tricky because I have a bridal shower, and then a dinner at my cousins house tomorrow, and a birthday dinner on Sunday. I’m going to work really hard on eating slowly and enjoying every bite, so that I don’t eat as much.

I just realized something really funny. I have several sisters, but one of them (and her husband) are often loud and overwhelming in a crowd (which my family is). When they’re at dinner, I eat more because I don’t talk as much, because I can’t hardly get a word in edgewise. When they’re not at dinner, I eat more slowly and space out my bites because I’m actually having a conversation. LOL, how funny! I hope she never sees my blog!

Anyways, I am hoping for snow this weekend, just for fun. It’s incredibly unlikely, so I’m crossing my fingers. I hope you have a great weekend!

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

What's next?

[Sigh] We’re already 4 days into 2011, if you can believe it! I had an enjoyable New Years Eve with Jeff and our small group of friends (actually my two sisters and BIL’s and my cousin and his wife). We went to a german restaurant in Portland called the Rhine.lander. A fairly genuine article from what I can tell. The food is always amazing, and they have an accordion player who goes around playing for different tables. Really had a blast! Then Jeff and I went home and enjoyed the show on TV until midnight, then went outside and watched the fireworks going off around us (about a half mile away on all sides, but around us the same). And then… We went to bed. LOL, I’m only 28 but every time we go to bed instead of staying up to 1 or 2, it makes me feel like I really am getting old!

2010 was a tough year for me. It ended with 2 and a half years of not getting pregnant (AF even came for a visit on Christmas. How’s that for a Christmas present?!?), and included the deaths of 3 people I was a caregiver for (all within 1 month of each other), my Grandpa, two great uncles, a great aunt, and numerous elderly ladies from where I work. All in all, around 10 people I had felt close to, or was related to.

The positive side; Jeff finished school finally (though he’s still looking for a job), and every blog I’ve read in the last few days talks of people’s resolutions which generally include drinking more water and remind me to take a sip! I’m doing great on cups of water this week!

I have my weigh-in tonight, and am thinking it may not be good. Since last week, we’ve had cheese, sausage and crackers around the house, and I’m really enjoying all of them! I’ve been pretty good about giving the sweets etc, to other people (who have good metabolism), but the cheese and crackers are going to end up being things I enjoy myself, simply because they’re my favorites. I haven’t tracked them the last couple of days, although I should have, so I’m pretty sure I’ve over eaten them. However, I’ve started tracking again today, and I am pretty determined to track every bite.

I’ve also still been unable to exercise because I am still sick. I think it’s getting better finally though, because although I’m still coughing a bit, it’s a lot less than I was before. Also, my back is doing a lot better. I’ve been seeing the chiropractor a couple times a week to get things in place, and that’s helped a lot. And then two nights ago, I was doing something and badly strained a muscle in my left arm, between my chest and my bicep, so I still haven’t done anything really physical. However, I am pretty sure that the muscle is much better now and my back, though still a little tender, is working properly and without pain and the Bronchitis is mostly gone, so I will be back at water aerobics next week.